Living well
Start with something specific: at the end of a day, beyond what you learned or accomplished, did you meet someone or encounter something that made you happy?
If you want something, try
Good grades, research, earning money, music—or still not knowing what you like. Begin with what you want now, try a little, and notice how it feels.
In the letter to new students, I describe arriving confused and how people and experiences gradually changed my judgment. University contains many firsts; leave yourself some room to explore.
When other people seem extraordinary
I get anxious too. Gaps between people and difficult interactions have even produced physical symptoms for me. That experience is in the opening essay, with the fuller changes in my freshman-year review.
You can admire someone and want to learn from them while keeping a life of your own. Talk and try when you see something concrete to learn. You can keep thinking about what does not yet have an answer.
Working yourself ragged is not a virtue is another author's discussion of work rhythms. Consider how you want to arrange your own days as you read.
Things that do not need a report card
Live music, bead crafts, tokusatsu, a café full of plants, sunsets by East Lake, and time with people you love. Imagining a shop you might open or where you might live is good too.
These things can make you happy in themselves. When research stalls or a competition goes poorly, life still contains things to look forward to.
Learn how to be with people, too
Explain why you are asking for help, state expectations in collaboration, and communicate a decision when something does not fit. There are examples in contact and collaboration.
Friends, relationships, choices, and regrets also appear as concrete stories in my freshman-year review.
Back to experience · A letter to new students
Other people's words may help
The first three LessWrong selections discuss advice, wanting to grow, and a sustainable pace. After reading, ask what specific thing you want to change now.